Art Kumbalek urges Milwaukeeans to honor Indigenous stewards during Thanksgiving
The columnist and cancer patient suggests readers share a joke or toast to Native Americans who have cared for the land for roughly 31,000 years.
By Larissa Shah ·
Art Kumbalek is writing about Thanksgiving in 2026 while managing a cancer diagnosis and a series of medical scans. The columnist, who identifies as a scorpion by birth sign, uses the holiday to address readers directly about how to spend the upcoming holiday gatherings.
Kumbalek notes that November arrives quickly after Halloween. He references the Latin root of the month, novem, which means nine, and compares the creation of the modern calendar to the design of the Ford Edsel. He cites Groucho Marx and Kurt Vonnegut to frame the passage of time and the purpose of human life.
The columnist points out that Veterans Day falls on November 11 this year. He also mentions the start of the deer hunting season in Wisconsin. He shares a joke about the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts, noting that beer nuts cost about $2.80 while deer nuts are always under a dollar.
Kumbalek offers a specific safety tip for Thanksgiving travelers. He advises readers to bring a piece of concealed carry protection to their gatherings. He suggests this precaution is wise in case a relative becomes cranky from holiday wine and pulls out a heater because the guest did not help remove a pier at a cottage near Hayward during the previous Labor Day.
The writer mentions his own financial needs. He says he could use advice on setting up a GoFundMe page to cover medical costs. He also asks for a bag of Gold Toe socks in men's size large for his birthday.
Kumbalek provides a short story for readers to share at their tables if they do not bring a dish of green bean casserole or a bottle of alcohol. The story involves a young man from the Northeast visiting a great-uncle on a farm in the South. The uncle shows the nephew chickens, hogs, and cotton. After a few days, the uncle suggests the nephew take a gun and the dogs to go hunting. The nephew returns three hours later and asks for more dogs.
Kumbalek concludes by urging readers to toast or pray for the Indigenous stewards of the land. He estimates their service at roughly 31,000 years. He describes them as ingenious protectors of the area. He signs off by reminding readers that he is Art Kumbalek and that he told them so.
The article appears in the November 1, 2026, edition of the publication. Kumbalek encourages readers to fight the good fight wherever they find themselves during the holiday.
